10y daughter & I in conflict over doll houses

[cinderspritzer]

My mistake. I didn't realize you were dad because in all honesty, I wasn't really looking at who posted. My response was not intended to offend.

[WyckedWood]

I support you too and I'm glad you asked the question or brought up the topic I should say. It got a lot of responses and obviously struck a cord with all of us in different ways. Which means it was a great topic. Happy to hear of the compromise :-) my two sons used to do a lot of Lego building, one is the do not touch this type and the other would prefer to play with them after they were built, whether they broke apart or not. I let them work that out themselves.. they each got their own Legos to build and didn't have to share builds.

[rackey]

Glen, just build houses for us - we will appreciate them and you don't have to watch us not play with them. Instead we could tape ourselves going nuts when the box you ship it in will arrive..... hahahaha

So, here is my name on the list for a Glen House.

Now this is really good advice. See Glen, we're not mean at all. We just solved your problem.

[Minis On The Edge]

Glen I feel your pain. My daughters don't play with theirs either. Their friends are in love with the houses. The girls like them on display :/ I think when they are older, they just may fall back in love with Dollhouses. That's my hope anyway.

[glen]

Given that most of you showed me no support and some do little with your houses I’d like to offer up a little challenge.

Perhaps a moderator could delete this post if not allowed.

Tell me I can’t play with baby’s house after I made it!

Take us for a tour of your dollhouse.

Using a small camera or phone make a walkthrough video of your favourite dollhouse, actually move the camera through the house. Not still pictures.

Get a friend (children or grandchildren on the computer for editing perhaps) to help by all means but you should be the one holding the camera. You are the Director!

Points to be awarded for

Entertainment value

Does it feel like walking through a dollhouse?

Commentary

Originality of video

Humour

Quality of the house - nil

Shakiness or focus of video - nil

Professionalism - 5. Yes! If you’re too professional you might lose points

Avoid fancy editing effects other than a title and simple transitions,

Keep it simple and make it fun. Invite us into your house and show us through.

This is not about having the best house nor the most professional Video,

Upload your vid to YouTube and post a link.

This is about trying something different, having some fun, interacting with and sharing your dollhouse.

As a little incentive for some if you like we’ll sort out some way of picking our favourites and I’ll send a 3D printed flat pack of the rabbit hutch, barbeque or oven for you to put together ..See photo’s

Dare you do something with your “display” house besides look at it? Get some help if needed and share your creation.

See the link soon for an example of what I’m talking about. It was made using a combination of a phone and a cheap camera. You can offer suggestions to each other as videos are posted. Reload your improvements etc. Then we can admire each other’s houses.

any takers?

[Selkie]

Sounds like a fun thing. I love finding walkthroughs of houses on Utube.

I think it's inspiring to, not only see how folks have set them up, but see into the designer's mind of how the houses, décor and such actually function in their world.

Personally, I don't have any access to videotaping or whatever it's called these days.

I can do stills with my camera and create a Powerpoint but, alas, no video.

My phone doesn't take pictures or have apps or any cool features.

It's from the dark ages and all it does is - wait for the surprise - hold your breath - here is comes - it makes phone calls!!! Woo hoo - I'm pretty cool here, aren't I?

Does GL have a Gallery setting for videos? Hm-m-m-m ??? I'm going to go search and see if there is a category.

[KathieB]

Nice thought, Glen ... but I'll bet a lot of us are video challenged, myself included. The few videos I've tried to post in my blogspot.com blog have come up as black boxes. Havanaholly has yet to master taking digital stills, never mind posting them here. She gets teased a lot about that.

On the other hand, there are some tech savvy folks here who may enjoy such a challenge. Why don't you start another thread with "Video your dollhouse" or something like that in the title and post your invitation there?

And nobody said you can't play with Baby's dollhouse. We're only suggesting that you be sensitive to her feelings about it.

[havanaholly]

Glen, we were trying to offer support by way of trying to give you insight into how Kavita might feel about her house. Kathie's right on about my picture-taking skills; digital cameras see me coming and black out; literally! That said, when I play with my houses I don't just sit and stare at them; they tell me installments of stories and I move things around appropriately; not much differemt from the way I played with my Keystone dollhouse when I was a little girl, except then I made up all the stories.

[chesterfieldzoo]

[glen]

Here's the kind of thing I was thinking about, done with a phone, the type of tech most people have easy access to.

http://youtu.be/jwqOqIlpTK0

Please don't post other peoples vids. I see there is a video link pinned to the top of the mini's page for you tube videos . Lets have a look at your house and your video.

And Don't worry, I'm not in the slightest worried about your thoughts on the sharing of the dollhouse. That's why I asked.

This idea was because I thought it might be fun to get you using your house in a way you wouldn't normally try.

I'm one of those weird people that likes a small challenge every now and again.

I've just rebuilt a 1:1 boats anchor winch, modified a friends model plane to fly by gyro's 'cause he planted a couple of planes, rebuilt the rear end of a tractor. Trying 3D printing, teaching Maths.

Anything different.

Kathie you black boxes for videos are exactly what we can all pitch in and help fix.

[Selkie]

Nice look at yours Glen. Thanks for posting it to get everyone started. Love your lighting ideas and those cool garage doors.

Sorry I'm not in the new tech generation but will look forward to seeing others.

I spent a huge chunk of time today over at Utube looking at videos that folks have over there.

Wow, there are some great builds out there.

Maybe we could start a new topic to house this cool idea so it can be found easily later on by using some sort of title with a key word such as videos or videotaping in the title.

EDIT:

Okay - duh time ... sorry I'm old - that's my excuse and I'm sticking to it.

I just found the pinned topic for dollhouse videos.

In case someone else is a challenged as I am, here is the link to the pinned topic.

[glen]

Sorry I'm not in the new tech generation but will look forward to seeing others.

Exactly what this is about. Crab some unsuspecting kid on his/her way to school and get them to video under your direction.

OK maybe not unsuspecting, might get arrested. Hang around outside the pub and grab the next person you see videoing a fight. No, that might cause issues too. and it's creepy......... I know, invite friends over for dinner and get one of them to help put a vid together. I'm sure they'd love to help. Someone you knows bound to have a bachelor of arts.

ps please read your quote above your member status.

[jbnmini]

After seeing your video, Glen, it doesn't surprise me that your daughter doesn't want anyone to play with it! You did a great job on that house!

[Selkie]

ps please read your quote above your member status.

Very funny Glen. You got me good !!!

[Caseymini]

Good one, Glen!LOL

[havanaholly]

OK, Kathie, you can make one for the pub or Maggien next time y'all come visit; can't use our phone, though, as it only makes & receives phone calls.

[Bex]

I know others have pointed this out, but your daughter has a mind of her own. We nurture independence in our children so that they'll be capable of making their own decisions as adults. I agree that modeling her houses does not mean she does not appreciate that. I'm glad you were able to work out a compromise though.

My pride and joy was built with my grandfather (when I was 17/18). I came up with the floor pans and my grandfather built it. I stayed close to him while he did his part- he didn't trust me in wood working, but that was ok. He asked questions, and I answered them the best I could. It's a cherished time I spent with my Grandpa. My grandfather is gone now and I will never have that time with him again. That makes the house all that much more precious to me.

Unfortunately, I've never really been able to furnish it or get any further with it then after we finished building it. Well, almost. We actually ran out of wood to do the outer walls. But I'm glad the walls weren't done- it makes what I have planned possible. It has been sitting for several years. People wanted me to get rid of it because it was "just sitting around wasting space" but, to me, that dollhouse is irreplaceable. Because he's no longer with me. Maybe your daughter wants to cherish her prized possesions now, but will want to do something else with them- refurnish, move dolls, etc, at a later date. I think my Grandpa would be glad I'm getting into dollhouses again, especially for what I have planned for my house; that I'm making an effort to do something with our team project. But, either way, that doll house has meant the world to me and I would never have traded it away for any thing. Because it stands for a cherished memory I keep of him. So, as someone standing in your daughter's shoes, please know that your dollhouses are appreciated. More then you may ever know. Hopefully that makes sense?

At the moment my house isn't "completed". (What with moving things around, are our things ever really "completed"? I'm not sure.) So I don't feel qualified to get in on your contest. However, that having been said, I do have a couple of videos on my Tube about it already if you want to see it. Check out youtube.com/user/BexCraftyCreations. The first vlog I did on my house, I made it look like I was going up the stairs during my tour. The second, I showed plans I have for my house. I haven't gotten much further then that. The second video was only done a couple of days ago. ;)

Hope this message has been an encouragement to you.

[Guest Sculptor]

Sounds to me like a budding future art museum curator! no kidding, a position in some art museum or the like where they have extremely rare, delicate and valuable artifacts would be the perfect place for someone like this girl to work in some day- neat, organized, carefull.

[rodentraiser]

Glen, here's a thought: can you do a quick build of another house of your own that maybe has some of the same features? Her friends can play with that one and your daughter can keep her own for display. The new one you make will be YOUR house. And you can do what you want with it, no questions asked.

By the way, I can't do a tour of my house right now, unless you want a tour of This Old House, as it's being built. The remodeling is still going on. And now I'm enlarging the laundry room! I'm only a year behind. I don't suppose you want to come to Washington state and work on my house, by any chance? Pretty please?

[Bex]

Out of the mouth of rodents. I know that you've sorted out the issue, but this could still work. That way your daughter could keep her treasures safe if she wants. I wonder. Do you build every thing for the dollhouses? Or does she put work into those houses too? That could make the houses mean even more to her- because it would be a project she worked on with you. Maybe you can both work on Project Playhouse together.

rodent, there are only too few doll house diys on the tube. I would encourage you to do a diy/quick time video (record yourself doing the project, then speed it up quickly). It'd be only too fun to see your house take shape.

[glen]

yes she has input into the house. Unfortunately her mum is one of those " that’s not right, that’s not good enough etc etc" types so it's difficult to encourage her.

ie The little coffee table I made, "where's the drawer"

Painting is her favorite. She's painted one of the rabbit hutches purple and blue and put it with her fairy house.

Did a great job of repainting the BBQ

I'd love her to be more involved but guess she has her own interests.

Very disappointed to find out she really wants to stop learning the piano but her mother told her she'd get rid of the piano if she stopped.

That won't happen 'cause it's my dad’s old piano but still sad she was threatened with that.

It's a funny old life.

I do know she's very proud of her house 'cause she takes visitors for a "tour"

[More Minis Dollhouses]

If its her dollhouse, then she should be able to use it as she likes. Play or display, its her choice. You can always build one for her friends to play with. All of my dollhouses are for display only and the the only play I do is redecorating or rearranging something. The real fun is in the assembly so that's my play time.

The more you push her to do something she doesn't want to do, the more she will see the dollhouse as an item of conflict and she will avoid it even further. Soon she will want to toss it out the window. You want to build positive memories around the dollhouse not negative ones.

[kat57]

As a former preschool teacher and a mother,I have to say,again,your child is becoming her own person-healthy expressions of autonomy should be encouraged. If they don't want to pursue piano or sports or whatever,I cannot understand why anyone would push it. The same with how a child chooses to enjoy any gift they receive,as long as they aren't destructive-and she sounds far from that...

[glen]

It's all good, she's a lovely lively little rascal who knows exactly how to get her own way. If I had a dollar for every time I've heard her told "no!" and then watched her walk away smiling with exactly what she wanted I'd be rich!

Typical spoilt "only child"

Trust me, just off the top of my head, and largely against our preference, she leader of the Kupahaka Group (Maori culture group and she's not a Maori), member of post primary principals choir, morning road crossing patrol thingy, term three librarian, peer mediator, school swimming rep (breaststroke), she takes swimming, plays the piano, last week won a singing competition at school, going on to finals, also last week came second with a friend in a dance competition, going on to finals, organized a team to build a scarecrow, Has been up on stage several times this year to collect awards Oh yes and she's in the netball team and she's tiny etc etc.

My problem is she seriously does way too much. But she loves it..We tell her too back of and then in she walks, “guess what dad……..”

She's a cool kid and knows she has me twisted around her little finger.

We often go to the batch together for the weekend and for 24 hours have only one rule. She has to brush her teeth. With mum out of the picture we rent movies, eat takeaways, watch TV till midnight etc etc.

In the morning I take her to the flying field for a couple of hours and then she gets to pick the next activity until lunchtime.

Keen fisher girl if the fish are biting, loves camping, swimming, mountain biking, She loves driving the boat and helps launch and retrieve it with the tractor, We just sold her go-kart cause she got too big,

Need I go on or does she still seem deprived.

How do I get her to back off is more to the point, not encourage her to do more.

She’s cool.

At her birthday party last year she organized a basket making game, one of her friends completely botched it up and when the girls went inside to eat Kavita disappeared. Turned out she was in the garage fixing her friends basket first and there was NOTHING I could do to stop her. All alone in the garage while her friends ate and played inside (probably with the dollhouse) Never been so proud in all my life.

The dollhouse is just a little part of her life.

[GirlPiper]

She sounds like an active, busy, methodical person. What a great way to make friends across the board.