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Back Surgery 2009


heidiiiii

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Liza said it well - all the emotions that you kept in check before the surgery (so as not to freak out about it) are now free to surface. What a tumult of feelings you must be experiencing ... your body tells you to take it easy - but it's used to being on the go, and probably getting a little antsy ... your mind says to follow doctor's orders and rest - but it's bubbling over with all the things you wish you were doing. Having a good cry is one way that the body cleanses itself of toxins and "bad" feelings. Try to think of the tears as therapeutic. Thank goodness Fred could take this time off work - he has an important job to do at home. I hope Fred is up to the task! Keeping you rested and happy is not going to be easy. I know you will do it, though - you're one strong woman, Heidi. :)

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What Liza and Rosalind both said - you're STRONG, Heidi. And don't forget that the body reacts in weird ways to the trauma of surgery. A biochemist friend explained this to me years ago and what it boils down to is for at least a week after surgery your hormones are just in a stew, which can have your emotions going up, down and all around. So go ahead and have a bawling fit, you will feel better afterwards! And tell Fred to be prepared to duck any flying objects LOL! Both are VERY natural reactions to what you're going through, so hang in there, you're doing good!

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Hang in there Heidi. You know you can do it. I know that my emotions were in turmoil after each of my surgeries. I walked the floor alot. But soon it will all settle down and you will fall into a "groove" and feel better. Your use to doing everything. HUGS

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Yeah,

I did want to throw something at him today. I really did and I wanted it to hit him in the head. I dont usually think like that.

My good mini friend has sent me a goody (that I am not ready for yet)..it is a laser cut lighthouse to put together. The pieces are freaking me out right now, so I will wait until my brain is better.

Still want a cigarette really really badly. that feeling has not gone away all day. I mean, I cried over it. I know being put under can do weird things to you afterward. I was put under for 3 hours so that is plenty of time to scramble my thoughts.

One of the things that is really bothering me is brain to hands. I am thinking clearly. I am speaking clearly..but when I try to type what I am thinking, it comes out wrong or misspelled and I have to start all over again.

Plus the computer screen looks weird to me. Hard to explain. But I said I would document what is going on with this surgery and this is part of it.

Okay, going to go lay down on the couch now. watch some more nothing on tv...I cant read either..same weirdness with the computer screen happens with the pages of a book or magazine.

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Your body is also de-toxing from years of nicotine, and there's the withdrawl facotr to play brain games with. On eth other hand, your body will heall much, much faster without all the toxins and carcinogens pumping into it from the cigarette smoke. Hang in there, sweetheart, you CAN do this!

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This has become My Back Surgery, My quitting smoking, and My building of the Greenleaf Laser cut Lighthouse. My fairy dollhouse mother sent me the kit in the mail yesterday.

Oh Kathie ...I got your card in the mail!! Thank you *waving*.

I really want to swear..but I am not allowed to here so I will use other words in place of swear words. Very benign. Dont take it the wrong way but I have lost so much this week..cant take that away from me. Okay.

When I walk up the stairs now it is one step at a time..good foot bad foot good foot bad foot. Then down the stairs is the opposite..bad foot good foot ..eh you get it.

I have been chewing extra classic bubble, two pieces at a time. The bubble popping and the gum snapping are probably driving even Perla mad but I have to do something or I am going to painfully climb the roof and pick off the neighbors..LOL

Natalie is safe in all of this. I do not exact my rage on her or around her. Fred is getting the brunt of it and so he should. I feel like crap. I cannot do anything that requires me to lift, bend, twist, sit, stand, or think at any capacity.

I know I said I was quitting smoking but I decided yesterday that I had changed my mind. Fred was not on board. So he had been called every name in the book..I live near a Navy shipyard so you can bet I know them all!

So he leaves. What does he come back with??? A box of freaking Nicotine Patches!!!! That sent me over the edge. I was peeeee Oed!

Now, some of you may think I am being irrational. You must have never quit smoking before...and quit while recovery from back surgery. It is a joy to behold!

I stained the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd floors of the lighthouse. I am going to go slow for awhile cause I am still a bit foggy from the surgery. *blowing bubble*

For some strange reason, while I am working on it (i put small pieces in baggies)..i start to think of Monty Python. I never really watched the series or movies in depth so I have no clue WHERE that is coming from.

Any ideas??

Back hurts but not so badly today. I had very bad nerve cramps in my leg this morning but they have subsided. I was told that this is all normal. Nerves are regenerating after being smooshed for so long.

Okay...breath in...breath out.. *blowing bubble*

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Vent all you like, Heidi ... we're backing you all the way as you soldier on ... and we're also quietly sending Fred some bouquets. Keep thinking of the love in "tough love" ... you'll get through this. If it takes feeding all the feral cats with the birds that run into your blue streaks and plummet to earth, then so be it.

:)

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I took a nap because I could not take much more of the nerve pain in my leg today. Feeling better. The nerve pain is from the nerves regenerating. So it feels like charlie horse that wont go away.

I took half a Vicodin and had a nice long nap. I feel better now.

I am nicer to Fred today. I did put the patches (one at a time..LOL) on. I have to keep my eye on the prize! $200 will get me a Macbook Pro very fast!

One of Nats Friend`s Moms made us some Puerto Rican Pasteles . This time of year is when they make them to freeze for Christmas. I bought a dozen. Oh man it is good. Fred made rice and salad to go with it. If you dont know what it is, you can google the name. It has Yucca and pork and spices..all in a banana leaf.

Yummy.

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I'm glad you're feeling better. I was getting a little worried for Fred. I quit smoking in august, whenever I started feeling like I wasn't going to make it, I would take a nap. The first week I got a lot more sleep than usual. Every day is a little easier, you can do it.

I did google Puerto Rican Pasteles. Sounds interesting.

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When I quit smoking, I put my focus onto a miniature rug. I covered the cloth in thousands of teeny-tiny French Knots. That way, I was too distracted to throw things! :(

I'm glad that you're feeling better today, Heidi. Each day will bring you closer to the new You. :p

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When I quit smoking, I put my focus onto a miniature rug. I covered the cloth in thousands of teeny-tiny French Knots. That way, I was too distracted to throw things! :(

I'm glad that you're feeling better today, Heidi. Each day will bring you closer to the new You. :p

I wish I could do something like that but not yet. Still a bit foggy from anesthesia. I am much better then before. I can read now. The computer screen is normal looking now. and I can concentrate a bit...but not ready for anything that would require me to think.

I have a lighthouse kit waiting for me when my mind is all straight (that way).

I think I will not be eating much and sleeping alot. Everytime I eat..I look for the freaking ashtray! Every single time. Then I get the twinge urge. Then i stuff another piece of gum in my mouth..LOL

leg still is achy tonite but not as bad as this morning

I plan on going to bed soon and getting a long and good night sleep!

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wow, I've missed out on a bunch! Glad to see you made it through surgery well and are home. Hang in there...hopefully things will get easier each day...I know, everyone says that right....the smoking part...that's rough....lots of luck and bubble gum for you :( Sending good thoughtsyour way !

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Have Fred stop and get you some suckers oh the good kinds too! My favorites was the apple blow pops but them I lived them all...and also get some hard candies.. that will help with the edge...

Good to see you are up and around!

oh and those inflating/deflating boots I loveeeeeeeed them lol It felt like I was getting a massage...

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I thought from the way that I felt this morning, that it was going to be a BAD day. I had some major nerve pain in my leg and it was that stabby charlie horsey kind. My incision site does not hurt as much. Kind of itchy (not scratching) and Fred says it is scabbing up already. I have two huge bruises on my left had. One is from the first attempt at finding a vein..the second is from the final attempt.

I came downstairs gingerly this morning, made my coffee, and took a couple Tylenol. After sitting for a bit and letting the meds and caffeine take over..I am happy to say the pain is gone...for now. I know that this is a part of healing and it will be back before it is gone for good.

I am on day 7 of not smoking. I am doing well but I still have pangs of freak out. I have my stash of patches and a big stash of gum. I have gained a bit of weight. But I am not worried. The Neuro said that would happen. I cannot move at all so of course I am going to gain weight. Plus I am bored. Good thing I cannot drive or live near a Sonic..or I would be in trouble. This will give me even more motivation to lose when I can go back to the gym.

My friend took my box of Stop smoking gum today. She is going to quit too. Since I have the patches from Fred, I decided

I will just be good the rest of today and try to do better tomorrow. I have been on a soup jag lately.

I am so freakin bored! I want to work on the lighthouse but there are some things I have to research how to do first before i can proceed (spiral staircase and painting an old nautical version of N,S,E,W on the floor of the first floor..in scale.

I accomplished TWO things today. I took everything off the top of the microwave, washed it, wiped the bottles (spices) and put them back. Fred brought up the Christmas wreath and I hung it on the front door.

Talking to Chelsea now on the phone. I can tell she wants to come home. 9 more days!

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Heidi, I have filigree fans in plastic and also in wood, for the treads for your lighthouse spiral stairs. $Tree used to carry the funky little plastic filigree fans, different parts of the ribs can be used for the treads, depending on the scale you're working with. PM me if you want one to get started.

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For the 1:24 lighthouse you can probably get one spiral stairway per floor per fan and the really skinny skewers for the poles to hold them, as well as for baluster spindles. Peggi made a spiral stair in her White Orchid. If you drill your holes in the fan blades just barely the diameter of the skewers you can string your treads on and cut off the pointy end of the skewer after you get the treads on, and use a dab of super glue gel to hold each tread in place after you get them spaced & arranged the way you want.

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Heidi, I made 1:24 spiral stairs for the houseboat using balsa for the treads and those jewelry pins thingies with eyelets. I ran a piece of gold cord through the eyelets for the railing. Go to my houseboat blog and scroll down to the music room photos. If I recall correctly, I used a bamboo skewer for the upright and slipped pieces of plastic drinking straw over it for spacers. I cut tiny triangles of balsa for the tread supports. Painted the straws and bottom of treads black to mimic wrought iron.

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Like that Kathie..like that very much.

Hmmm. You have got me thinking.

Compass! Thank you. My dad was a sailor and I could not remember that word!

As you may have read in what are you doing today? I had a major/minor freak out with Chelsea. Ugh. My leg hurts again now. I was on the phone with the airline for awhile getting her flight booked and I did not pay attention to the signs.

I took some motrin to calm the twitches. I want to be better tomorrow. My kid is coming home early and I want to make a list of foods she wants to eat.

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